The following discussion focuses
on self-forgiveness as one of the acts of life that fills experience with
purpose. It brings love to a place where it wasn't before and transforms the
spot by bringing a different fulfillment.
When we do self-forgiveness, the channel that opens up
is inside. We initiate a channel from the basic self through the high-self.
Through that channel, we stand in the light and reconcile our belief with the
truth of self. In essence, we align with the Holy Spirit and declare to the
basic self that the limiting belief or separation is discontinued and replaced
with essence of virtue it was blocking. For example, you may forgive yourself
for believing you are unlovable. By so doing, you tell the basic self to align
with your innate loving as an internal and transcendental source.
The sense that the energy is outside comes from the awareness that the source
of transformation is outside the system of the belief, which is the
self-concept, or status-quo. The transformative energy is embedded in our depth.
In quantum fashion, when we forgive ourselves the inner and outer source act as
one. The self-forgiveness tells the basic self to change and invites the
high-self to transform the limitation. This action communicates a change in our
relationship to the unconditional love that is God. This changes the way we are
nested in the personal and universal field. The self-forgiveness changes how our
consciousness is nested in the One. So the transformational energy is outside
and inside of us. A simple movement of the heart, like kindness, has a similar
effect. It is a technique. It is also a remembrance of self. We re-place our
selves into the givingness of self that preceded the taking from self.
©Copywrite, Robert D. Waterman, 2004

This section is extracted from Robert D. Waterman's book
Self-forgiveness, an Act of Life (1976).
Though the temptation is there to think of self-forgiveness as a
technique, it does not function so in practical application. The concept will be
developed by elaborating on fifteen qualities of self-forgiveness.
1.
The deepest tendency within
humankind is toward balance and growth. All urges, needs, desires, and
accomplishments somehow stem from our own archetype seeking to fulfill
itself.
2.
Whether the individual works
with or against those deepest tendencies is a matter of choice. Humankind rules his life by
choice and in experience man dramatizes who he is. Regardless of age he will
meet situations and subdue or be subdued by them according to the meaning
structure through which he perceives the events. He may alter what was already
known in order to adapt, or move blindly in the face of his own darkness. The
choice is an expression of love and will.
3.
Situations in themselves are
not imbalancing; our response, the meaning we impute, the choice we make, can
imbalance. Any experience represents an
opportunity for growth and any situation we encounter has the potential to
integrate or dissociate our ability to live from our inner vitality.
4.
Though we may not be able to
change past situations, we can change the meaning we carry within us regarding
those events. Although an experience is in the
past, we can relive the experience in the present and change the meaning we made
out of the experience. Recall, in itself, is not enough. The interrupting
experience must be transformed. We can change our mind and as we do, the pain evoked
reactivates the inducing mental-emotional judgment, releasing both as the
pattern becomes conscious. As these patterns are systematically released, the
natural flow of life-force through the body is reestablished, as well as mental,
physical, and emotional well-being.
5.
Choice always involves three
components: thought, emotion, and action : symbol, energy, and direction : love,
will, and consequence. We cannot avoid choice.
Abdication of choice is a choice. As we cannot avoid choice, we cannot avoid
responsibility. The understanding of the self is acquired through experience.
The process of acquiring is perfect in the
beginning and always will be. The step called mistake is in a sequence which is
a perfect process of experimental discovery. If we attach our identity to the
mistake, we are in effect a mistake. After a while our identification as mistake
rather than a maker-of-mistakes leads us to the philosophical conclusion that we
have no power to alter that conclusion. Our ability to create is blurred by
identifying with the mistake. We lose the ability to recycle our mistakes
through the "purifying fires" of the Higher Mind. To fear to act
because we may be wrong is the greatest wrong because we abdicate our
"dominion" and our "inward kingdom" which results in our
outward domain falling to external forces and controls. We narrow our conscious
awareness to a small realm of threatening shadows.
6.
Cause and effect have in each
life a historical pattern of connectedness and are woven and re-woven through
individual understanding of its symbol, energy and direction.
7.
The reference, or locus, for
the natural tendency within humankind for balance and growth is within.
It is hard to imagine the
potential for creative human influence when individuals recognize the degree of
inner authority that can be exercised. The locus of intellect and love within us
is far deeper than we perform -- it is at the depth that we are a Being that is
one with the Father-Mother principle, and yet still deeper, the unmanifested
Source. In this Higher Self reference we so loved the possibility of ourselves
that we created a begotten personality as an instrument of growth and change so
that we might understand our eternality, and thus live consciously in our
eternal perception as co-creators with the Divine.
8.
Each choice, large or small,
has an effect (a consequence) of either moving a personality closer to his or
her deeper being or further away.
9.
Self-forgiveness is a choice
with an outcome of greater cooperation with the inherent, internal tendency
toward balance and growth. When in response to circumstances
we create self-pity, injury, fear, grudges, etc, we deny to ourselves the use of
a great resource, presence intellect and power from within us. Divine love
is unconditional and ever forgiving and is available to us directly through the
Higher Consciousness. When we attach ourselves to an external reference through
judgment, we block the consciousness of redeeming love and super-conscious
wisdom from our use. When we relive the energy and symbol that blocked us and
forgive ourselves, the Divine Balance is allowed to enter our personality and
establish the same condition in our personality world that exists in our higher
consciousness world.
10.
The activation of
self-forgiveness is enhanced or impeded by group-process.
11.
Self-forgiveness is as
effective as it is sincere; yet, is activated according to the individual
ability level. Sincerity is a skill. You may be
at a level of sincerity and tell me that you will do this or that, yet in ten
minutes you may have grown in sincerity and discover that in reference to now
you lied, yet it seemed true then. If you take on guilt or try to justify the
discrepancy you will lose the gain you made. However, if you confront your lie
and take action to fully utilize the gain, the lie becomes a positive action and
moves into a corrective law. We may re-experience a distorted moment and forgive
ourselves and release much.
12.
Self-forgiveness is a
conscious choice, a subconscious realization and a higher -consciousness
acceptance (It is not a belief). Self-forgiveness is not a belief
-- it is a knowing and as such our choice and statement places it as an active
element within us. When we re-experience the past and choose consciously to
change, corollary patterns occur subconsciously and super-consciously. There is
a realization of the impact of the conscious choice: the experience of release
and change of meaning is recorded in place of the old interpretation.
Super-consciously new vistas present themselves to the conscious mind. Reprogramming can change patterns in the subconscious mind through repetitious
affirmation -- but self-forgiveness changes the patters in the subconscious mind
through direct intervention of the Higher Self.
13.
Self-forgiveness is
spontaneous in people who have gained the ability to relate to the unity of life
with the entirety of their being. Even though we may be self-realized
beings and all our conscious levels are highly synthesized, we are still here,
still growing, and still confronted with choices and mistaken choices. The
difference is that when our growth is more progressive than evolutionary,
realization of the mistakenly applied energy is sufficient to release it.
Release and understanding, both act and consequence, become spontaneous.
14.
Self-forgiveness carries the
implication that all events are purposeful and ultimately worthwhile.
If self-forgiveness allows us to claim an understanding that we did not possess
before, then the purpose of difficulty is to solve that difficulty, to
understand, to extend and expand the ability level of our Soul -- it seems that
all souls are equal in their perfection but not in their ability level. In this
context, we conceive that we have never done anything that was not worthwhile.
We were always worthy in in ourselves; it was the belief in attachment to error
that created a sensation of unworthiness. When the sense of inherent worthiness
returns, growth accelerates and balance is enhanced. Our quest is to learn to
use our inherent worth to master life.
15.
Self-forgiveness is
economical - the best use of human energy that can be made out of any event, for
experience is only wasteful when it is not used for growth, for greater
understanding; we are wasteful to the degree we are ego-attached to our
mistakes. There is a moral imperative in the understanding of energy
and its exchange and perhaps the only moral imperative: "Unto thyself be
true"; THYSELF -- not the belief patterns of the mind that masquerade as self. The personality is a garment, a vehicle by which our Being
might enter the real of Earth to gain the wisdom thereof. It is to the Being
that we are true. There is no dogma to re-alignment of the personality -- mind,
emotion, and body -- with the Soul and Spirit, only self-forgiveness. We hold
within us a vision of what we could be and an image of what we are -- how we
handle this discrepancy is crucial.

"As a man who has devoted his whole life to the most clear headed science to
the study of matter, I can tell you as a result of my research about atoms this
much. There is no matter as such. All matter originates and exists only by
virtue of a force, which brings the particles of an atom to vibration and holds
this most minute solar system of the atom together.
We must assume behind this force the existence of a conscious and intelligent
mind. This mind is the matrix of all matter"
Max Planck from his Nobel Prize for Physics acceptance speech.


The following
interview was transcribed from The Healers videotape produced April 30,
1992 by Karen Cherniack and Lightvision Productions. The clients had aura
balancing sessions with Ellavivian Power.
CLIENT BILLIE: At one point – and I'll never forget this -- at one
point, this is a sweet old lady, man, right? I mean, this is a
white-haired, sweet grandmother. I mean, it's everybody's grandma. At one
time in the balancing, it got so difficult for me that I started getting a
little jive and started doing a little two-step, like. And she smashed me
on the shoulder -- man, she hit me so hard I couldn't believe it.
She got my attention. And the whole balancing ended with a series of
self-forgiveness, because she tied in some Bible stuff, like the Kingdom
of Heaven is within, and God lives within the Kingdom of Heaven, right? And then
she'd tie in where Jesus says, you're created in God's image, so if all of that
is true, how can you be unworthy?
So, you know, I'm going -- I'm doing a little dance, like, you know,
maybe I am okay. And it was the first time in this life time when I started
looking at the possibility that maybe I am okay. And I didn't understand the
purpose of all of this self-forgiveness stuff that we were doing; but I
went along with it, because I didn't want to catch another rap on the
-- somewheres, you know.
BOB ROUNDTREE: Aura balancers believe that the aura can actually become distorted or
blocked or unbalanced by judgments we make about our life experiences, which in
turn can cause physical illnesses or other manifestations. And at the core of
these auric imbalances are feelings that lie deep within. Billie's auric healing
session combined Ellavivian's balancing of his energy field with his own
self-forgiveness, allowing him to release the blocks in his aura that were
perpetuating his disease.
We asked Ellavivian to explain how this idea of self-forgiveness became such
a critical part of auric balancing.
ELLAVIVIAN POWER: We lectured before the parapsychology forum in New York in one of the
hotels. And there would be, oh, all the way from 300 to 500 people there. We're
there that night, and we had all given our talks, and here comes this little old
lady, and she had on this gray knit shawl. She walked up to Dr. Hunter and says,
"I need an appointment." And Dr. Hunter says, "Well, I'm sorry
but all the appointments are taken." She says, "Well, you eat lunch
don't you?" And Dr. Hunter said yes. She says, "Well, I'll be there
tomorrow. What time do you eat, 11:00?" And we said yes. And she had
weeping ulcers on her legs, and she had to come over from New Jersey on the
train. And so at 11:00, here comes knock, knock on the door. We open up the
door, and here she stands, and she's got this basket, and she has homemade bread
and has made these tuna fish salad sandwiches, and she had freshly squeezed
carrot juice, and she had carrot cake.
And Dr. Hunter had her come in and take off the stockings, which were soaked by that
time, and had us go in and wash out the stockings and hang them up to dry. And
we started working on her. And at the end of the hour, why, her stockings were
dry. She took her basket and she left. The next day, here she comes, and she had
in her basket all of her goodies, and we washed out her stockings. And Dr.
Hunter usually would come in at the end to check her out, and she looked up at
her and she says, "Tomorrow you're going to heal me."
So the next day, here she comes. And we went through the same procedures, took her
hose off and washed them. And she was on the table. And we had done the pendulum
work, and I looked up and down the hall, and here come Dr. Hunter --
had her pendulum in her hand. And she walked up, and she always put her hand on
the body. That's how she got in tune with it. And she dropped her pendulum in
the aura, and then she said, "Why do you hate God?" And this old lady
said, "Why shouldn't I hate God?" She says, "He took my mother
and he took my father. He took all my brothers and sisters, my aunts and uncles,
and I am left alone with these crying legs." And she was a nurse. And just
at that moment -- "And I hate him," she says. And just at
that moment, all those jackhammers stopped. And it was just like silence fell
over the whole city. And then all at once, she said, "Oh, my God, what have
I done to myself. What have I done to myself?" And she says, "Oh,
Father, Mother, God, I forgive myself. I forgive myself. I forgive myself."
Dr. Hunter laid her pendulum down, and walked out. And she -- we go in
and get her clothes. And before she left, Dr. Hunter came back into the room,
and she looked up to Dr. Hunter, and she says, "I knew you could do
it."
So that's how self-forgiveness came to be incorporated into the work.
RON HULNICK: It appears as though we've been given a cosmic delete button, which is
forgiveness, so that we can literally erase or delete the judgments. So it's not
uncommon in our work where people will bring up judgments that they have
-- that they may go back for years and years and years and years,
and they release them. And instantly, there is like a flood of well-being
that comes through the system, a relief, a feeling of having let go of a heavy
weight, that kind of a thing. To me, that is truly the healing process.
ELLAVIVIAN: It's incredible, the way that the energy will release out of that when
someone says "I forgive myself." And then forgiving themselves, for
creating it for themselves, for passing a judgment on themselves, for feeling
guilty about whatever caused it -- there's many, many implications
in it.
The person may even feel it in their physical body. They may have been carrying it
for years and never known that they had any energy block. But when it's released
and the energy flows back through again, they feel a lot better.
BILLIE: So through a series of self-forgiveness, I was able to take care
of that. I didn't understand what they were doing, but it was working. I was
feeling this incredible energy. I was feeling stronger than I had felt in a
long, long time.
RON: The concept of self-forgiveness is becoming more and more
accepted in the field of psychology, at least as I'm seeing it today. The work
of John Bradshaw around shame, they use forgiveness a lot. He recognizes it. And
more and more, I'm seeing psych books that are coming out that talk about the
need for self-forgiveness as psychologically helping.
ROBERT WATERMAN: In the development of aura balancing, when they started, Dr. Hunter
and Ellavivian Power and those folks that were developing that, hit upon this
idea of self-forgiveness. It was like the epiphany of human existence, in
a sense. That's a good word. It's where -- it's that moment that
brings the meaning of life suddenly clear. It's like an epiphany. So the
person's life is directed at realizing something larger of something that's hurt
inside.
RON: So if we can move our consciousness into the place where we really can
move into acceptance and don't do judgment, just do evaluation, and we behave on
the basis of the evaluation for the highest good of all concerned, but we don't
make the person wrong; when we make them wrong, we go into the negativity.
It's like there's the act of holding this bad thing against myself, so
that I forgive myself, and I can -- and I can really allow myself to
feel that forgiveness come in. The most amazing thing will happen that will drop
down deeper, and they’ll drop into a place inside that is filled with love and
compassion.
So we would say that healing, really, is the application of loving to
the parts inside or outside that hurt. If you think about it, if you set a
broken arm, that's a very loving thing to do to that arm. And I'm suggesting
that this idea of healing energy is really loving energy. And I'm not saying
anything that really hasn't been said for thousands of years by people who
talked about those things.
CLIENT SHIVA: What it did for me was move me to a greater compassion for myself, for not
knowing any better; for seeing that I was making the best choice I could at the
time about something, or the best assessment, even, about it; and to forgive
myself for not knowing better for such a tender and compassionate approach to
myself, that had nothing to do with being the fighter that I was before that
time. Nothing to do with that. I was just very macho and nasty with myself. Just
so nasty. And self-forgiveness brought a much more softer and tender approach
and let me release those things much quicker.
RON: If we can all learn to forgive ourselves and to forgive judgments that
we've placed out, that one thing, to my way of thinking, would do more toward
healing in all of the systems than any one single thing that I know of.
It's also very challenging, because most of us have not been brought up that way. We
have been brought up to make people and things and situations wrong.
SHIVA: I can't make anything more important than loving myself. There's nothing I
could do or say or any way I could be that could be bigger than my love for
myself; or if I do that, the consequence is really negative. But when I make my
loving more important and override anything else, that's what
self-forgiveness is.

Do dolphins look for God? If they have never been separated
from God,
why would they look? Maybe they swim in God as they swim the ocean.